He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
