No stitches, just platelets and will power
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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