I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
Randomize
