Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
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