he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
