It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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