I am puke
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Randomize
