"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
