So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
