So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
