You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
