It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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