i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Randomize
