Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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