I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
