Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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