The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
