Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
