so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Randomize
