Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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