Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Randomize
