i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Randomize
