Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
