These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Randomize
