I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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