Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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