I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
