but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
