if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
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