Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
