Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother

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(623): View more from Arizona

I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.

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(815): View more from Illinois

i don't really know how much tequila is too much

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(615): View more from Tennessee

The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.

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(630): View more from Illinois

He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.

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(949): View more from California

Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.

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(630): View more from Illinois

Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling

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(910): View more from North Carolina

3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.

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