Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Can I color on your dick again?
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
