The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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