My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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