"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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