a queef is a wish your heart makes.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
