"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Randomize
