new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
