My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Randomize