I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
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