Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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