its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize
