New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
