Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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