I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
