she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Nobody cheats on THIS.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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