i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
