Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
