Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Randomize
