if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
our cab driver is having phone sex.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Randomize