This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
